Book Reviews: Sex, Lies and Menopause & Natural Hormone Balance

This week I did a brief summary of the books Sex, Lies and Menopause by T.S. Wiley and Natural Hormone Balance by Uzzi Reiss.

Some topics that we covered were:

• the importance of our hormones
  
• symptoms of low estrogen and progesterone
• 3 ways to prevent cancer
• possible causes of breast cancer
• bioidentical hormones

For the outline and websites from the talk, see below:

Outline of the talk
Symptoms of low Estrogen or low Progesterone

Map of Doctors & Pharmacists who prescribe Wiley Protocol Bioidentical Hormones
Write Price Pharmacist (I called Leigh Ann's compound pharmacy and he said the cost varies but shouldn't more than $40/month. Her pharmacist doesn't sell Wiley Protocol but he said they can make any formula of natural hormones that the doctor prescribes).

Kristin's Shower of Blessings

Scout and Sage

AP Clothing Exchange

Here are some pictures of the mommies and babes who attended our clothing exchange. Enjoy!

AP Living Family Campout

The other day, Emily, Lisa and I were getting excited talking about planning an AP Living family campout. We thought this would be an ideal bonding time for our families. We can make 1 or 2 meals together, play, hangout around the campfire, etc. We could even make it an annual tradition.

The plan is to go for one night, arriving the morning of Saturday, April 17 and leaving Sunday, April 18. We are thinking of going to Doheny State Beach. We need to make reservations ASAP since things are already filling up for that time frame. I am not totally clear on the cost; it looks like it depends on the location. But it may be approximately $30-$35 per family. Also, the date is not fixed. We may need to change it if the campsite is already full by the time we make reservations.

If you think you and your family can come, please post a comment below, so we can make a campsite reservation. Also, remember to put your name in the comment if you have a profile like "mama bear" or "muffin man," etc., so everyone knows who you are.

Topic of the day: Unschooling

This past Monday morning, January 11, we were graced by the presence of three articulate, knowledgeable moms of "unschooled" children.

Video from Unschooling Meeting:
What is unschooling?
What does a typical unschooling day look like?
How do unschooling kids learn to read?
How do you document what you do?
What are the challenges you face as parent doing unschooling?

"Unschooling" is a form of homeschooling, which our speakers described as "a natural transition from attachment parenting" and "letting learning happen". One mom described it as organic learning: not forced, but yet not hands-off, either. Primarily and probably most importantly, the focus of unschooling is simply to follow your child's/children's lead in whatever subject matter interests them at any given time. And the fun part, as one mom pointed out, is that you're with them every step of the discovery process, learning new things yourself, too, as you immerse yourself in information.

Recommended Books

• Unschooling Our Kids, Unschooling Ourselves
• Anything by John Holt including How Children Learn, Learning All The Time
• Sandra Dodds Big Book of Unschooling
• A to Z of Unschooling
• Alfie Kohn The Case Against Competition

Other resources the speakers' mentioned:

For a list of recommended unschooling/homeschooling websites click here.
For more information on how to apply to be a homeschooler/unschooler in CA, click here.

Here are a few pictures of the beautiful babies (and beautiful mommies too!) that were at the meetup today. Our Unschooling Guest Speakers were Karri Lewis, Katheryn Culwell, and Paige McKinney (you can find them on Facebook). Enjoy!

A Few More

Another Day in the Park

Here are some photos I took of our meet up on Monday, January 4th. Enjoy!

The Ackerman Family

The Saldana Family

Edwards Family

More More Easter :)

More Easter

Easter 2009

Shiposh Family

Here is the next installment : )

The Adams

I thought I'd post a little sample of pictures from each family's shoot. Here are the Adams....

Pictures from Nov. 30

Thanks, Dawn, for taking these cute pictures!!

Healthy Meals and Snacks Nov. 23

Summary by Laura

Thank you for having me speak at the park about food and healthy snacks. I think that if we continue to give our kids healthy food options (carrots versus cookies), they will grow knowing how to eat healthy foods.

Here is a delicious recipe for butternut squash risotto. This can be given to toddlers, but even those babies who have more teeth to chew with. Risotto is typically a mushy type of dish so it would be suitable for those babies starting their whole food stages. I don't follow recipes when cooking but this is how it is made. I substitute half butter/olive oil when sauteing and also use onions and garlic. I also don't add the broth all at once; I add it in stages. It takes a little longer and if you have a child who is good at interrupting, then you may want to just add it all at once.

Butternut Squash Risotto:

INGREDIENTS

• 1 tablespoon olive oil
• 1 large onion, chopped (about 1 3/4 cups)
• 1 garlic clove, chopped (optional)
• 1 cup short-grain rice (such as arborio or carnaroli)
• 4 cups vegetable broth
• 1 1-pound package peeled butternut squash roasted in the oven, cooled and then the flesh is scooped
• 1 tablespoon chopped fresh sage (optional)
• 1/4 cup whipping cream

PREPARATION

• Sauté onion and garlic in olive oil; cook until onion is translucent, stirring often, about 5 minutes. Add rice; stir 1 minute. Add hot broth; increase heat and bring to boil. Add squash and sage; reduce heat to medium and simmer until rice is tender but still firm to bite and mixture is creamy, stirring often, about 15 minutes. Stir in cream, shrimp, and pancetta. Season to taste with salt and pepper. Transfer to large shallow bowl.
  This makes a ton, enough for eight side dish portions or for leftovers. And, you don't have to use all the butternut squash in it. I roast one whole butternut squash and use half in the risotto and then some of it plain, as a side dish, but also mix some with cheese to make quesadillas. Its delicious.

Pictures of Baby Pierce

More Monday Pictures

Pictures from Monday at the Park

Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves

The SALVE Formula, Naomi Aldort, PhD

Separate yourself from your child's behavior and emotions with a Silent Self talk.

Attention on the child

Listen

Validate, without dramatizing

Empower

This week Patina led an excellent discussion on Naomi Aldort's book Raising Our Children, Raising Ourselves. Patina explained that a key point of book is that we have " 'mind-talk' that prevents us from understanding the child and from knowing how to respond." These voices we hear in our head I call the superego, which are voices or messages we heard growing up, or from society, about the way things "should" be.

Naomi Aldort's SALVE formula addresses the mind-talk issue. The first step is to "separate yourself from your child's behavior and emotions with a Silent Self talk." We can take a moment to identify this mind-talk for what it is, just chattering in our head, telling us a story evaluating what is going on in the situation with our child. Then we can be prepared to truly see the behavior of our child without arbitrary evaluations going on in our head.

Once we have cleared our mind or bracketed the mind-talk, we can then give our attention to the child, in nonreactive state. I believe this does not mean that we separate ourselves from our emotions, but rather we be present with our emotions and not simply reacting. Giving our attention to the child also means in a sense "holding a space" for the child and his/her emotions. Letting the child experience his/her emotions without judging them or shutting them down.

Then we can listen to our child, and truly hear what is going on in the situation. Once we hear our child, then we can validate he/she, which meets a core need for them. Once they feel heard, we can empower our child to make perhaps a different choice if that is necessary, or perhaps we as parents are the ones who need to alter our request in that moment.

Thank you, Patina, for your passionate understanding of Naomi Aldort's philosophy in raising loving children. I felt encouraged by the discussion and I am sure others did as well.

For the complete handout Patina spoke on, click here.

Bedtime Routines

This morning we had another fun day at the park. We were celebrating Ella's 1st birthday! We also each shared what bedtime routines we do to help soothe our children before it is time to sleep. The theme was that we try to stay flexible, not trying to put to sleep a child that is not looking tired. Some ideas to facilitate a sleep inducing environment were:

*to keep the lights off, or on low,
*do bathtime right before bed as a cue bedtime is following afterward,
*rub your child's back or feet with lavender oil (this one I want to try with Sierra, especially),
*nursing, of course,
*soft music,
*quiet environment, low stimulation,
*reading books

Another important thought that came up was to not engage in a struggle with getting your child to sleep. If they resist, often they are not tired enough. Maybe they need more activity during the day to get their energy out.

I also got pictures again of our cuties:

The birthday girl! Ella turned 1 today!

Halloween Harvest Party @ Park

Wisdom from Mothers

Through motherhood, I'm learning that life is less about control and more about balance.

Being a mother has brought better communication, more empathy, much more patience, and much, much more conscientiousness to my life.

Motherhood has challenged me to strive toward new ideals while letting go of past (and current) shortcomings.

Never have I been more aware of how my actions impact others!

If I only give one lasting gift to the world, I hope it will be that of kind, loving, and generous children.

-Sarah

As a mother, I have learned that seeing joy in my child's eyes makes all the hard work of parenting worth it.

Being a mother has been a humbling experience. It has heightened my need for God's and other's grace.

When you feel at the end of your rope, reach out and call a friend for support.

-Julie

What is a Secure Base?

When a child is securely attached, he/she is "confident that his parent will be available, responsive, and helpful should he encounter adverse or frightening situations. With this assurance, he feels bold in his explorations of the world. This pattern is promoted by a parent, in the early years especially by mother, being readily available, sensitive to her child's signals, and lovingly responsive when he seeks protection and/or comfort." A Secure Base: Parent-Child Attachment and Healthy Human Development by John Bowlby

After about a year of bonding to the mother (or primary caregiver), the child has internalized memory after memory of loving experiences with mother. Their tummy now has a well of love within it. With this tummy of love from bonding with mom, the child is now interested and able (with mobility) to explore the world beyond mother. The child edges out to go explore and runs back to mommy for reassurance and care. Going on little adventures exploring new things is scary and draws from their love bank, so the child quickly returns to safety, the secure base of mother. The love and care the child draws in when returning to mother for comfort, allows he/she to venture out even farther into the adventurous world of exploring.

The mother's role after the intense bonding phase (approximately the first year), becomes a secure base where the child decides when he/she needs to return and receive comfort and care. This begins the gradual process, that will unfold over years, of leaving mother to venture into the world.

Insightful Quotes

"Infants whose mothers have responded sensitively to their signals during the first year of life not only cry less during the second half of that year than do the babies of less responsive mothers but are more willing to fall in with their parent's wishes." A Secure Base by John Bowlby

"Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you yet they belong not to you. You may give them your love but not your thoughts, for they have their own thoughts...You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you. For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday. You are the bows from which your children as living arrows are sent forth." The Prophet by Kahlil Gibran

"You get an empathetic child not by trying to teach the child and admonish the child to be empathetic, you get an empathetic child by being empathetic with the child. The child's understanding of relationships can only be from the relationships he's experienced." Becoming Attached: first relationships and how they shape our capacity to love by Robert Karen

"The infant's (0-3 years) fundamental need is to receive unconditional love and care...Training and discipline are necessary as the baby enters toddlerhood, of course, but good training does not undermine the overriding need for the 0-3 children to learn to receive." The Life Model by James Friesen, E. James Wilder, Anne Bierling, Rick Koepcke, and Maribeth Poole

"The idea that early and abundant independence from parents is desirable may be part of an overall societal pressure on kids and parents toward early forced independence (also seen in pressures toward early weaning, sleeping alone and through the night at a very young age, and so forth). More and more research is showing, and parents are discovering, that strong attachment bonds between child and parents, not forced independence, creates happy children and healthy socialization." The Well-Adjusted Child by Rachel Gathercole